{"id":5550,"date":"2023-07-14T12:45:19","date_gmt":"2023-07-14T11:45:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wp.novlr.org\/?p=5550"},"modified":"2023-07-14T12:45:21","modified_gmt":"2023-07-14T11:45:21","slug":"how-to-face-rejection-and-know-your-limits","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/how-to-face-rejection-and-know-your-limits\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Face Rejection and Know Your Limits"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When I was pursuing an MFA in Fiction Writing, every time I got a rejection letter from a publication, I would tape it to my bedroom wall.\u00a0By the time I earned my graduate degree, one entire wall was quilted in hard-earned wallpaper. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">My attitude was, \u201cI\u2019ll show them!\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When my peers saw it, they had a different reaction. Why would I want to show off my rejections? How does that help?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Every writer must face rejection. It is built into the process. The sooner we accept that the more swiftly we can progress.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By displaying my rejections, I was trying to use them as fuel for the fire of my ambition. I wore the rejections like a chip on my shoulder, and I thought a wave of spite would give me strength, imbue me with righteous indignation, and fill me with energy that would pour out onto the page in swift, exceptional prose.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But my wall of shame did not help me write better fiction. I was going to write stories whether I had a wall of rejections or not. In hindsight, it was a waste of effort, a vanity project, and ultimately my personal monument to missing the point.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"576\" data-src=\"http:\/\/wp.novlr.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-min-an-1629212-1024x576.jpg\" alt=\"Wall of rejection - Photo by Min An for Pexels\" class=\"wp-image-5552 lazyload\" data-srcset=\"https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-min-an-1629212-1024x576.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-min-an-1629212-300x169.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-min-an-1629212-768x432.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-min-an-1629212-800x450.jpg 800w, https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-min-an-1629212.jpg 1280w\" data-sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 1024px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 1024\/576;\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I want to climb into a time machine, appear in my old bedroom in a puff of sci-fi steam, and shake my younger self by the shoulders. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cRejection is part of the business,\u201d I would tell myself. \u201cIt is not evil, not a personal attack, and certainly not a billboard announcing your continued failure.&#8221; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;These editors are people,\u201d I would continue, breathless and desperate, \u201cand they have their own tastes, biases, distractions, workplace politics, and deadlines. By rejecting me, they aren\u2019t necessarily saying I&#8217;m terrible. All it means is the story wasn\u2019t what they wanted to publish <em>now<\/em>.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It\u2019s true that rejection can suggest issues of quality. Anytime you get a form rejection letter, you will wonder if the publication was swamped or if they thought so little of your story that it didn\u2019t merit more than a perfunctory, \u201cthanks, but no thanks.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But, the <a href=\"https:\/\/novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/how-to-learn-from-criticism-and-rejection\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">type of rejection<\/a> you receive can sometimes offer great feedback if you know where and how to look. It can indicate where you need to focus your edits, or how you can improve your writing for your next project.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">An agent who takes the time to send the manuscript back with personalised notes, for example, suggests there is something there worth working on. Often, in those cases, after some revision, you can even send them a fresh version to consider again.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sometimes even just a handwritten \u201cSorry!\u201d on a form letter can feel like a small victory and help you face rejection. It means they considered your manuscript worthwhile, just not right for them at that moment.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Most commonly, however, the reasons your manuscripts are rejected are beyond your control. Agents may have placed a similar manuscript recently, may not have room in their catalogue, or may just flat out not publish the type of work you are pitching (which is why it\u2019s so important to <a href=\"https:\/\/novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/how-to-vet-a-literary-agent\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">vet your literary agents<\/a>). Just because your work is good does not mean it is a good fit for every publication. And that is ok.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So, what can we control?\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"583\" data-src=\"http:\/\/wp.novlr.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-suzy-hazelwood-1576302-1024x583.jpg\" alt=\"Only a writer knows - Photo by Suzy Hazelwood for Pexels\" class=\"wp-image-5553 lazyload\" data-srcset=\"https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-suzy-hazelwood-1576302-1024x583.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-suzy-hazelwood-1576302-300x171.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-suzy-hazelwood-1576302-768x437.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-suzy-hazelwood-1576302-800x456.jpg 800w, https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/pexels-suzy-hazelwood-1576302.jpg 1280w\" data-sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 1024px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 1024\/583;\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We can grow our <a href=\"https:\/\/novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-beta-readers\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">beta reader<\/a> group to gather diverse feedback. We can use that feedback to rewrite and revise frequently. We can seek out <a href=\"https:\/\/novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/what-kind-of-editing-is-right-for-me\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">quality editors<\/a> to review the manuscript before it goes out. And we can do our homework on agents and publishers, reading other work they have published to get an idea of whether our writing may align with their focus.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When we do these things, we prevent rejections from being self-inflicted. The rest is up to luck, chance, or fate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Rejection is not fun, and it doesn\u2019t always get easier over time. However, rejection does signal that we are serious writers, willing to take risks for the sake of our chosen profession.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">My friend, the novelist David Alexander Baker, once told me a story about how his novel <em>Vintage<\/em> took 40 rejections before it was picked up by an agent. That\u2019s a lot of rejection to weather just to get in the door, and there was no guarantee the agent would succeed in selling it to publishers. But that is the business. If we\u2019re not ready to weather those storms, then we\u2019re not ready to publish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So, how can we face rejection as a positive to stay motivated? The trick is to set yourself a limit \u2014 whatever you\u2019re comfortable with.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Send out those manuscripts and those query letters, but when you get the rejections, keep a running tally for each piece. For any given piece, set your upper limit of rejections; the number that marks your end of the road. My personal limit is 50.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If the piece has merit and it\u2019s right for the market, someone will likely publish it before it hits your limit. If it does reach the limit with no interest, it\u2019s time to put it away and move on to try again with a new manuscript.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Maybe you face rejection because your manuscript needs more changes to make it viable, maybe it doesn\u2019t fit the market, or maybe it\u2019s just not the right time. That\u2019s ok. You did an important part of the job; there\u2019s nothing to say you can\u2019t revisit the manuscript and the process again later when you\u2019ve developed as a writer, or the market is more primed for your work to fit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When you set a limit, you have an end in mind. You know how far you need to go. Each rejection moves you closer to resolution, whether publication or relegation. Each rejection inches you closer to a goal. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Framing this painful task in a positive light helps lessen the sting of each individual rejection. You may even find yourself submitting more frequently, recognizing that it is a numbers game, and ultimately improving your chances at being successful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">From now on, think of your rejections as little mile markers on a highway. You rely on them to measure how far you\u2019ve travelled, calculate how much farther you need to go, and then watch them shrink away in your rear-view mirror.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When I was pursuing an MFA in Fiction Writing, every time I got a rejection letter from a publication, I would tape it to my bedroom wall.\u00a0By the time I earned my graduate degree, one entire wall was quilted in hard-earned wallpaper. My attitude was, \u201cI\u2019ll show them!\u201d When my peers saw it, they had [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":29,"featured_media":5551,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[36],"tags":[88],"class_list":["post-5550","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-publishing","tag-traditional-publishing","et-has-post-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>How to Face Rejection and Know Your Limits | The Novlr Reading Room<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Every writer will face rejection when submitting to agents and publishers. Learn to spin them as a positive, and set your limits.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.novlr.org\/the-reading-room\/how-to-face-rejection-and-know-your-limits\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to Face Rejection and Know Your Limits | The Novlr Reading Room\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Every writer will face rejection when submitting to agents and publishers. 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